TOUR THE WHITE HOUSE

No Waiting!
No Tickets! No Pesky Secret Service!

No Olympic Capabilities Necessary!

Just Scale The Fence...A Short Romp...
Voila! You're In! 

That's All You Need To
Tour The Family Residence!

Leave Your Gun At Home...
Bring Your Favorite Knife

SHAKE HANDS
WITH THE FIRST FAMILY

OR SLAUGHTER THEM!

Get Your Name In History Books
For Killing

The First Black President--
Bigots Will  Rejoice!